There’s a magic and beauty of revisiting a place that changed your life! It’s like coming home, going back to the familiar, but with new experiences to draw from. I visited Soulshine Bali in January 2018 for the Soulrocker yoga retreat. A week of mind, body, spirit, and total reset! I met 35 strangers who soon became a second family, a family I came to rely upon once leaving and who I honestly don’t know how I got through life without before. I was connected to these wonderful people from that point on, in a deep and meaningful connection that only we can understand.
9 months after being there for the first time, I went back to Bali and my first stop was Soulshine. Seeing the logo off the side of the road instantly brought a smile to my face, it felt like home. Once I got out of the van I was greeted by the friendly staff, the amazing river (with naked men bathing in it), soft music, and the wonderful walkway that reads in stones ‘Welcome home, inhale, exhale, be free, be happy, let your soul shine’ I couldn’t believe I was actually back. After leaving here in January I was in such a magical place mind, body and spirit wise. It wouldn’t last long, but I didn’t know that at the time. I believe I was at the soulrocker retreat in order to prepare me for what was yet to come. This time around, I was ready to let go of some of that.
When I attended the retreat in January I was still recovering from heartbreak, yet to accept that my ex and I had parted ways and in that, we wouldn’t be in each others lives any longer, not even as friends which was unfathomable to me at the time. I was also trying to let go of old patterns and habits that had become toxic in my life, which I’m still working on and probably will be for the rest of my life. Upon leaving the last time my ex got engaged while I was still in Thailand and my dad had a stroke within 36 hours of me landing back in the states. My ex and his fiancé broke up a month later, and my dad died 6 weeks after his stroke. It was an emotional roller coaster I’m not sure I could have gotten through had I not been there before it all happened. This Bali trip was for me! For me to heal my mind, body, and soul after all it’d been through up until now. To take the desperately needed time to refocus and re-center myself and my priorities. To truly reconnect with myself, a person I’d lost somehow over the last 9 months.
My friend Jen, who I met on the soulrocker retreat met me at soulshine which was so incredible! She too has had a rough few months after returning home from Bali. We both had the same ideas and intentions for our trip. Reset and really take care of ourselves while holding space for each other to do so. We had so many wonderful, open and honest talks throughout the week. Playing therapist to one another as well as just simply listening. It seemed as if we both asked each other the right questions at the right time, bringing things to the surface we both knew we needed to face as well as either work through or let go of. We visited a healer, Chokodo Rai who told me that my womb was blocked as well as “new job, it’s coming”. We went back to the holy water temple, a sacred place to both of us, that we had visited as a group the last time we were in Bali. We hiked a volcano at 3am and watched the sun rise while eating hard boiled eggs cooked in the steam. We took care of our bodies by eating good, nutritious food, staying hydrated, doing yoga, as well as numerous massages and other body work throughout the week. We were both exhausted and simply needed to rest as well as work stuck energy out. We napped, we were never in a hurry. We were present and grateful to have the time to slow down and simply be. We checked in with ourselves through meditation and really listening to what our minds and bodies were telling us.
It’s amazing to me looking back at where I was in January to where I am now. Still so many things to work on and work through, but also seeing how far I’ve come. I am no longer in contact with my ex, something I couldn’t deem possible in January. I am still grieving the loss of my dad and probably will be forever. I will always miss him. Some days simply harder than others. Bali felt different this time. It felt familiar, like another home. Not a place I’d like to live, but one that I’ll visit often. I felt more prepared going there this time. Taking the time beforehand preparing and really shedding light on the things I wanted to release while there. Working on forgiveness of past and present resentment, which I’ve found rather challenging. The zen and bliss I feel while in Bali is like no other place I’ve ever been. It’s inexplicable, it’s something you must feel for yourself. I was up at dawn and witnessed almost every sunrise in the week I was there. It was pure and utter magic! The sounds of sunrise as well as the utter beauty when the light finally appears is unbelievable. If you’re in the right place you can hear the morning chants as well. I had a wonderful routine. Wake up, meditate, journal, coffee, and simply enjoy the quiet and magic of the morning. It felt like time stood still throughout the week, a feeling I remember in January as well. Bali for me forces me to be present and simply enjoy every single thing.
I am forever grateful and know that I definitely will be back and Soulshine will most likely be my first stop every time. The place that changed my life, that showed me connection with strangers in one of the most amazing experiences you can have and that if you take the time, connecting with yourself can be too.
Mindfully Authentic 